Wrestling: Random babbling

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I wonder what Robert Roode and James Storm could do as a team...

Also, I suspected something was up with the Mitchell and Abyss story. It had to be truly personal. There will be some royal hell to pay for someone on that story...

 

Interesting you would mention Storm & Roode, they will team up this week on Impact.

And good news! Black Moronic FINALLY lost the X-Belt! Lost it to Devine, with a little help from 3D. Unfortunately, he won the X-wrestler award of the year.

Oh, and remember my prediction of Fallen Angel returning as Curry Man? Look at this week's match:

This one, though, is just plain weird:

First, why would a main-eventer like Cage end up in a match with Mesias? I understand Mesias is being pushed as a monster heel, but there are biggest, baddest, toughest guys to beat the hell out of than Cage.

Abyss attacks Mesias: No problem, they hate each other. Squirt Angle & AJ Wimp attacking cage: Predictible. Tomko making the save? I guess that regardless of what he says, he still holds some kind of allegience to Cage. I don't know about you, but I think Cage & Tomko would make a solid alliance. Not a tag team, but an alliance - I like the way Tomko is being pushed as a monster, though he seems to be on the verge of a face turn, or maybe a tweener turn. Cage is hell-bent on revenge, and I like that, though Squirt has that little bitch Styles to kiss his ass, so Cage definitively needs some backup, and Tomko is perfect - think how many years they've been together. But with a twist - each continue their singles career, joining forces when the need arises.

And Abyss/Mesias/Mitchell? The one who will have hell to pay is Abyss. He and Mesias are to meet in a Barbed Wire Massacre match at the next PPV, and keep in mind Mitchell also manages Black Reign, Rellik, and if I remember correctly, Raven looked to be part of the game, too. Speaking of Raven, we haven't seen him for ages. Impact is starting to lack violent, bloody matches. That should be fixed up. A 4-way Clockwork House of Fun, anyone?

 

I'm wondering if someone (*cough* Russo *cough*) isn't putting the brakes on the violence on TNA. I also think that that same someone is responsible for limiting the rise of Styles, Samoa Joe, and will do the same to Roode, Storm, and anyone else that wants to show that they have real talent...

 

Chuck Palumbo is on the verge of completing a heel turn. While I personally find it hard to take Palumbo seriously after the Billy & Chuck angle, it might help him - he now gets a lot of heat while before he got, well, nothing.

The roster of a wrestling website I'm a regular of shows Storm in the list of the "Recently departed". There were some rumors he wanted out, but if he really is out, then TNA has lost another huge name. Then again, they've been making dumbf*** decisions for as long as I can remember. Knock off the Squirt Angle show or give the damn WHC to Cage, Roode, or any other TNA original who busted their asses only to get tossed aside by the WWE rejects.

Hooker B is the worst of them. Man, was it peaceful and good while the idiot was off looking after his w****.

And the absence of violence? There was a barbed wire massacre match between Abyss and Judas Mesias taped recently. This is the same type of match Sabu had VS Abyss a few years ago. Can you believe Mesias LOST?!? Bloody hell, tell me Mesias isn't already being buried, tell me this is just a prelude to an even more violent Abyss beatdown.

 

But that level of violence is restricted to one match a night. The problem is that those fans that clamour for that are only thrown a token bone occasionally by the mainstream promotions. If the original ECW taught us anything it is that people DO want blood. If WCW has taught us anything, it's that lawyers have only one place in wrestling--in a barbed wire cage with the most insane guy on the roster...

 

You know, this is exactly what is pissing me off about TNA. Look, I have no problem with their wanting to become better know, but I DO have a problem with TNA moving more and more away from their roots in favor of mainstream crap.

Raven is sitting on a bench. Black Reign is involved in a ridiculous feud with Kaz. Judas Mesias is being buried by Abyss. Rhino can put up one hell of a violent match, but he seriously needs a heel turn. Test was released. Storm wants out. TNA refused to discuss with Sabu for a possible return because they didn't felt he was big enough of a name and prefered to give the spot to a WWE reject. The woman's division gobbles valuable TV time. BJ James wants to cash his title match with a 67-year old man as his partner. Squirt Angle still is the WCH.

Something's got to give. Seriously. If this crap goes on, I'll get the five extra channels removed and keep five more bucks in my pocket for CZW, NJPW, NOAH and UFC DVDs.

 

Well, We have Spike TV anyway because the rest of the family likes some other channels only available in that package, so I don't complain. I'd actually like to add the Fight network because I want to see more Boxing and MMA. They also have some NOAH and they used to have RoH as well.

It may be as late as June before we get High speed, so I will have to wait to see CZW...

 

I miss ECW.

 

Hey... guess what - Seen-It is back,

And they scripted him to win the Rumble. They will script him to face Orton. They will book him for another long and painful title reign. Give me a gun so I can kill myself now.

As for CZW, Gnarff, the Cage of Death matches are worth the price of a single DVD - if they even offer DVDs.

Fight still has RoH, though it's older - 05-06 - episodes. And for MMA, Spike has UFC, while Fight has TKO. Both promotions are good, though personally I lean towards UFC.

 

I'm going to get a chance to go shopping tomorrow. Maybe after getting the important things, I may look for some CZW DVD's...

Edit: The store I was thinking I might find them in is no longer in the local mall. I did however get a book called "Wrestling Babylon". It talks about the seedier side of Wrestling. The Chapter on the Von Erichs was the most horrifying thing I've seen in years...

 

The s***heads at TNA have decided not to renew Raven's contract, which means we'll never see him again on Total Nonstop A**holery.

Smart move, d***heads. Oh, but I forgot... you prefer focusing on Squirt Angle and your stupid "knockouts" division.

Thankfully, I'm picking up a few CZW DVDs tomorrow. F*** you, TNA, and F*** you, WWE. F*** the big promotions - long live the indys.

 

So how low do you have to score on an IQ test to get a job working for one of the big promotions? If they can do something stupid, you can bet that they will do it!

Like Cena winning the Royal Rumble...

 

Yes, it was a bonehead move. But what else can you expect from the idiots in WWE's creative?

Now, not only will this moronic A-hole get a title match at No Way Out, he'll also be defeating everybody who wants a title shot. And of course, nobody can beat this dumb f***er.

It's not all bad, though... we get the Elimination Chamber at No Way Out. Good, free violence.

TNA and Raven? It's officially done. They could have shipped him to creative - maybe he would have cooked some better storylines. But no, let's bury all our homegrown talent and give the spots to WWE rejects. And let's waste time on the stupid "knockouts" division - let's get some barely dressed, big-boobed bimbos, let 'em loose and watch a catfight that will boost ratings because of every horny idiot out there drooling.

And I got a few CZW DVDs. Ultraviolence is an understatement. The Cage of Death matches and the Tournaments of Death are the most violent stuff I've seen in my entire life - it makes even the old ECW look like a children's cartoon show. Seriously.

 

When we get High speed, I will be searching out some of that violence...

 

I don't get the release of Raven myself. I mean... what on Earth were they thinking? Even someone like me who's had next to no knowledge of TNA period knows that he's practically one of the symbols of the organization. Even if he wanted more money in his contract that they wanted to pay, or a similarly problematic thing, it boggles the mind that TNA would just say "Sure, here's the door. Bu-bue!"

I can believe you have to be slightly crazy to be a wrestler and skirt major injuries every week, but I don't know why managers have to be the biggest idiots of the entire affair.

 

Well, the website I get my news from is usually reliable, but it contradicted itself this time. Appearantly, people close to the company have reported that Raven has NOT been released. Those same reports hold he was offered a new deal by TNA, but has not yet accepted or refused it.

Unless TNA brings out a hardcore division (which isn't likely to happen because they're a bunch of crap-eating morons), I don't really see where Raven fits in. Sure, he has done a lot in his illustrious career, but TNA's current product just doesen't fit with Raven.

I mean, the guy is right at home in bloody, violent matches - he was the creator of the House of Fun match - and he has both bled and made a lot of people bleed throughout the years.

Nowadays? When was the last time you saw a truly violent match in TNA outside a PPV? I think it dates back to the "Xmas special", the match with the barbed wire tree and the wrapped weapons. Raven's own House of Fun is a great match because it features something else than [censored] thumbtacks and broken glass. And hell knows I'm tired of Abyss, the tacs and the glass. Remember the last House of Fun match? Trash can lids, chairs, kendo sticks, even a freaking fence! How cool is that?

It's no big secret I am a huge Raven fan, so I can but hope that we see him back on Impact. But let's face it... TNA is now a huge, stinking pile of manure.

Raven is a creative genius, so he would be right at home in the Creative department... and maybe he could save us from Russo and all the crap.

Whatever happens, I can but hope we get to see Raven back and better than ever.

Quote the Raven... nevermore.

 

Ouch, DotW, are you sure you want me to mess up classic poetry? Shame on you .

Violent matches: quoth the Raven: Nevermore.

Proper bloodshed: quoth the Raven: Nevermore.

Actual wrestling - with respect to Kurt Angle, who might actually know how to wrestle if the higher-up let him - and heel of face, he can - Nevermore. I really, really don't get it - th I mean I suppose the scriptwriters are on medications/drugs not expressly banned in the old US of A... Say what you want about Kurt Angle - if he has to, he can wrestle. Unfortunately, that doesn't mean he has to hog all the spotlight as he tends to do. I mean how the hell... He has a somewhat likeable role as a arrogant, somewhat idiotic wise-guy - the kind of person you want to get beat night after night. Just how on earth could TNA mess this up? Hate me, sue me, but I stand by these words.

May the TNA rest in peace - or as hardcore fans say, in pieces. It was one heck of a promotion, and I will try to watch it however I'mable. Sure, the zombie may yet rise out of the casket - but I somewhat doubt it. If it does, DotW, I will ask you to be the bard of the new age - and I hope you accept. I have a fairly awful base voice.

I wish I received RoH here. Unfortunately, I don't - so I have to settle for watching the classics, such as wrestlemania X here. May Owen Hart rest in peace - I've never seen an opening match like he put with his brother here. Can I get a "Hell Yeah!" for a classic here? Thank you.

It's weird, and it has to be - a period where WWF and WCW were on top of their game, and actually worth watching. Can I get an Amen here? May kopurka* bless you all.

*: those who frequent the WotC forums may get it.

 

To an extent, I can understand what TNA are doing - they're trying to spread their wings, and they're using Squirt Angle's star power to do it. But enough is enough - it's like TNA has become his own reality show. I immensely enjoyed the moment Tomko beat the living crap out of Angle.

The old TNA has been one HELL of a promotion. The weekly PPVs NEVER disappointed me. The old TNA has left many great memories - including Raven winning the NWA World Heavyweight Championship, which was one of the best moments, IMO. When he defended the title against Abyss, he dished out an UNBELIEVABLE match from the opening to the closing bell. And who could forget the Clockwork Orange match against Sandman? Two of the best hardcore legends stepping together in the ring for an everything goes match? Worth the price of the PPV alone.

Raven single-handedly turned beating people to a bloody pulp into a form of art. Raven has been a cult icon everywhere he has been, and if there was a Hardcore Hall of Fame, he would have the best spot. Sabu also deserves a mention of honor for his contribution to hardcore wrestling. Passing on an opportunity to bring him back was an incredibly bonehead move. But then again, the TRUE TNA is dead and buried.

Maybe someday the zombie will indeed raise from the grave. Maybe someday the stupid "knockouts" division will bite the dust. Maybe someday Vince Russo will be shot and fired and shot and buried and pissed on. Maybe someday violence will once again reign supreme in TNA. If that day ever arrives... then I WILL be the bard of this new golden age.

RoH? I have the utmost respect for those guys. RoH is wrestling in it's purest essence. Kudos to them for having remained true to what TRUE wrestling should be for all these years. Kudos to an unbelievably talented roster which can spread their wings and shine. Did you ever saw the Briscoe brothers in actions? They are the most talented tag team I have ever seen. They're an incredibly well-oiled machine, perfectly in tune. Kudos to Nigel McGuinness for being such a great heel and an extremely talented wrestler. I immensely enjoyed the moment when McGuinness took the World Title off Danielson. There is also a twist of irony to this story: McGuinness was Pure Champion and Danielson World Champion, and RoH held an Unification match. McGuinness was defeated, and therefore, the Pure Title was dismissed. McGuinness was the one who defeated Danielson for the World Title some time ago. Danielson took McGuiness' title, then McGuinness took Danielson's title.

I also cannot go on without mentioning Japanese wrestling. I caught a classic GHC World Heavyweight Championship (Kenta Kobashi defending) match tonight on Fight. This match had me on the edge of my seat for the half an hour it lasted. No storyline crap, just rivalries and pure wrestling. NOAH, New Japan Pro Wrestling, Dragon Gate - you'd be hard pressed to find better wrestling.

And yes, I remember the time when WWF, WCW & TNA were at their prime. Unfortunately, all good things must come to an end.

Fortunately, we can still satisfy our hunger for blood and violence thanks to CZW. To picture CZW, mix two parts old ECW with one part old TNA. The Tournament of Death and Cage of Death matches are well-named.

 

I can't watch either one of these without asking at multiple points why I was watching this ...

But then again, how many legitimate stars have had their shot at the big time because they had some really bad habits that threatened a huge controversy or made them hard to work with? Could that be why we're stuck with Cena...