Spanking Kids / Causing Pain / OK?

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It's not just volume, but also change of tone that gets their attention. My eldest, soon to turn 4, test us constantly. When she asks for something, if our response is not immediate and to her liking, it's throw a crying fit time. I do find that mostly, putting her in timeout or telling her to go to her room for 5 minutes works. But not always. Sometimes, she gets downright irritable and gives us some very negative feedback. Only after all else fails will she be spanked. It has only had to happen once. She is learning and now gives us much less trouble. As she gets older, she "gets it".

 

For the same reason that people are often against capital punishment. Or putting thieves in the town stocks, or whipping them through the town square.

 

No. What we have is the modern views on raising children (which has taken dominance in continental europe) versus the old way which has existed during the entire existence of mankind. Sweden is far from the only country that prohibits corporal punishment at home (and that's what spanking per definition is). There are several others including the bulk of continental Europe.

Since I don't have any Children and I certainly don't know anything about raising them, I refrain from arguing about the subject more than that.

 

There are parents who do that too.

 

Do any really prohibit spanking? I know that the UK only has guidelines in place which restrict the amount of force used... basically you cannot beat your child.

 

Are capital punishment, putting thieves in town stocks, and whipping them (thieves) through the town square "small physical pain?" If that's not what you're saying, then I don't understand what those things have to do with each other. If you're instead somehow saying they're all grouped together as archaic notions or something like that, you still have to explain why that is, and why it's not justified regardless. Just being 'old' is not a good enough reason.

 

Its illegal in Norway too. Allthough some kids do deserve a good spanking, thats for sure.

 

If an anti spanking law came about in the Uk I would say it would be a deterrant to people to having children, I would not consider having a child if it were enforce, likewise as I already have a child if such a law came into force now, I would comfortably say that I would not take an active roll in disciplining my child, it would pretty much do as it pleased... I wonder if people's misconceptions of the law (alot of people think that an anti-spanking law is in effect in the UK) have resulted in our current social problems, our out of control youth violence and... for example, the london riots.

 

Yes, all of them. Spanking is by definition corporal punishment, there's no way around it unless there's special clauses for spanking. The UK and the US for example both allow corporal punishment in homes. Germany, Austria, Finland, Sweden, Norway, Denmark Poland, Romania, Bulgaria, The Netherlands, New Zeeland, Hungary, Spain, Portugal, Venezuela and Kenya are examples of countries that have explicitly banned ALL corporate punishment of children at home.

I'm not sure if you're trolling or just jumping to silly conclusions but I'll play. I wonder if the positive attitudes towards spanking in Britain were the cause for the riots since the youth were taught at an early age to solve their problems with violence. Heck, even France had very bad riots some years ago and their laws about corporate punishment are even more lax since they allow corporate punishment of children at schools as well!

And no, I'm not serious so don't bother answering. It was made to point out the idiocy of your speculation. In any way I'm done with this topic. It would have probably been better not to join the discussion at all, but it seemed like everyone were attacking at the views against spanking like they were a revolutionary agenda that would surely corrupt the entire society and cause all children to become uncaring psychopaths if implemented in law. When in fact it's the law in many countries and those countries are yet to descend into full anarchy and most haven't had proper riots ever.


EDIT: Heh, corporate punishment... Well I would not be too surprised to see outsourcing of spanking to corporations coming up as a business model.

 

That's pretty good.

 

I dont think comparing countries which hold pacifistic attitudes to countries like the US and UK can be compared, you cant compare Islam to Bhuddism

correct, they didnt have riots before the ban, so how do you know the ban has helped, youth crime is still at the forefront of societies problems in many of these countries.

no, I'm sure they have the best intentions to make sure all parents raise their children according to their values, I dont care what views the baby boomers have, I will raise my child properly, according to my values.

once again bringing us back to what I said earlier, how people who have never been spanked, never spanked and know nothing about spanking who are at the forefront of the anti-spanking campaign, who claim to know best about spanking and what it teaches children - when infact they know nothing about it, but demand that those who use it effectively as a discipline tool obey what they think.

 

That gave me a chuckle. Most people learn and develop their own set values from the example given to them by their parents. The baby boomers are those people born between 1946 and 1964. Most of the people posting on these boards are the children of baby boomers*, meaning most of our values that we learned from our parents are baby boomer values.

* And in some cases, like T2Bruno and Splunge, they are baby boomers themselves. I think dmc just makes it into GenX (1965-1979), but he's close.

 

That sounds more like abuse. There is a line where "spanking" goes to "abuse" -- I think most laws are put in place because men like your father (and it's predominantly men but some women are also guilty) don't know where that line is.

 

My parents never used "pyschological" punishment. Never. They gave us the ground rules and we were expected to follow. If we didn't we were given many chances. But if we failed to comply, we got spanked. Luckily it didn't happen much. I still remember the last time my mother "tried" to spank me. I ended up laughing at her because she couldn't hurt me. She broke down in tears. I felt terrible. It's a little story that she tells every so often, ususally on the holidays after a drink or two. (She isn't a bog or good drinker, she only drinks on the holidays, which is very entertaining for the rest of us..) It's a little piece I keep in the back of my mind to remind myself that as my kids get older, spanking will be a "less" useful tool as they mature. My mother waited to long t stop, though she barely did it anyway, but the point is we do learn from our parents mistakes.

 

baby boomer is a general term used in this country to describe these people who are massively 'pro baby', you often see them shouting slogans like "breast is best"

good luck, out of curiosity, how do you plan to punish your children?

thats what I was thinking