Kitrax's Goodbye

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Damn, that's crap. Had crossed words with him more than once, but always respected the bloke. RIP man.

It just goes to show that you never really know what's going on under the surface with some people...

 

I suppose that is some measure of cold comfort. And I do agree that seeing as how none of us saw this coming, we did all we could do once we found out. The total time from Kitrax's post to the polie arriving at the house was just a few hours - but from what information we have, there were only minutes available.

I also agree with Rahkir - Kitrax did not appear to be the type of person who would have said anything was bothering him, even if it were.

 

RIP Kit, there's now a big hole which you used to fill here

 

I got a return PM from Kitrax' account this morning. I sent him something yesterday as soon as I saw his post. It was strange to see the notification of a PM from Kitrax. A somber start to the day.

 

What, on here?

 

@T2Bruno, you have my deep sumpathy. He was a good friend to many of us but I think especially you. That is it. What is there to say.

 

Yeah Barmy, from SP. Either his family got on the account or one of the mods.

Thanks Nakia -- I wouldn't call us good friends but I really empathized with what he was going through (it was like deja vu for me). I saw myself going down that same path many years ago, but I thought he was on the up swing.

 

I didn't know Kitrax well, but I still sympathize with you all. So much irreparable harm is done by senseless acts such as these, to parents in particular, yet I believe the discernment to see the act as senseless is clouded in the minds of those who suffer so severely. Such a shame ... such a waste.

 

Just posted on Facebook:

Dear family and friends, we would like to invite you to Aaron Joseph Buzard's funeral services on Saturday November 6th at the LDS chapel on the corner of 7000 S. and 4800 W. in West Jordan. Services will start at 11am with the viewing at 10am. We hope you can come help us celebrate his life.

 

Wow. Like others, I too am left speechless by this.

 

Goodbye, Kit.

 

Are there any lessons at all we can take out of this tragedy? Especially those of that are parents?

I can't imagine what his parents must be going through.

 

In this instance, I think there is little to nothing we can take out of this. The issue is that none of us really knew Kitrax personally. Yes, we knew he recently went through a divorce, and that he was living with his parents again, and that his life in the past few months has been pretty rough. That said, we don't see him on a daily basis, we wouldn't see changes in his personality, we wouldn't see if he seemed overly depressed, because such actions and emotions are not conveyed well on an internet forum. No one predicted it would have come to this.

In order for use to look back and take something out of this, we'd have to ask ourselves what we should have done differently. Barring foreknowledge of the situation, I don't see what we should have done differently. If you just don't know, you just don't know.

 

Hell, Harbourboy, hell.

As for lessons for parents I can only suggest encourage your children to share their feelings and problems with you without your being judgemental. Love the and let them know you love them.

Unfortunately it appears that Kitrax did not share his feelings with those near and dear to him. He kept a cheerful face with a heart of anguish.


"Real men don't cry. Only females and babies cry." Maybe that is why women generally live longer than men. I am crying.

 

Thing is that even if we did know him personally, even if we did see him on daily basis that wouldn't mean that we could have done something more.

I guess all we can ever do is trying our best to show people that they can always come to us for talk or help. Maybe in some cases that can change things.

 

His roommate and a family friend have messaged me further today from Facebook.

One wanted to say that he mentioned being a part of our community and that he spoke highly of it, enjoyed his time here and the people that were part of it.

 

Well, from the sounds of those posts he's made in there, it sounds like he 'expected' to get back with his wife and move back in with her, and things to return to how they were. Like the idea of finishing for good with her never entered his head. Women are strange things though, they don't mope like men do, and move on pretty quickly. Maybe that's what happened and that was a contributing factor. However, I don't really see the point in delving too far into his personal stuff now... R.I.P.

 

This is real. And horrible. Devastating. It's not everyday that you open up a thread in your favourite forum and find out the poster has really, really ended his life, maybe mere minutes after posting it. Just the thought of it sends chills down my spine. I feel sad. I feel truly sad for him and his family.

I can't imagine the pain and suffering he must have felt to drive him to end his life like that, so sudden, and final. Depression is a chronic, life threatening illness. I have been prognosed with depression years before. I was lucky. Sometimes, other people may not notice the pain in the depressed person, especially if the person puts on a facade of some kind to hide his feelings. This does not mean they don't care. Anyone with even the remotest thoughts of self-harm should consult an expert for help, and try to open up more to his close friends/family about his problems.

Ofcourse I don't know the circumstances in his life and mean no disrespect. I can only offer my condolences and prayers...