Maturity

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In a couple of threads the issue of maturity has arisen, for example Aldeth's assertion that one is about as mature as one is going to get at age 27. This has peaked my curiosity. Specifically, I am interested in all of your opinions as to when you think people typically mature, and when you think people are mature enough to fall in love and/or have sex. Related to this is an old argument between me and one of my good friends, the argument of whether or not high-school realtionships are intrinsically doomed to failure. I argue that, while most fail, some can and do last beyond high school, flowering into meaningful adult realtionships, whereas he argues that the number that last beyond high-school are so minute that the chances of them lasting beyond high-school is virtually 0%. I would be interested as to all of your opinions on this debate as well.

 

1st Debate, maturity. Too complicated >_<

2nd Debate. I believe you are correct. Most relationships created while one is in high school and below will fail. However, they will server as experience for while you grow up. My grandmother's sister first met her husband when they were 12, became bf/gf secretly and they are still very happily married.

 

1) When does one reach maturity. Too complicated for me.

2) I think most high-school relationships are a learning experience. I have known a few people who met in high-school or even younger who are happily married 50 years (or more) later.

I don't see high-school relationships as failures but as part of the growing-up process.

edit: spelling

[ April 08, 2006, 03:52: Message edited by: Nakia ]

 

Depends entirely on the people involved.

 

I'll be 46 next week. I'm about as far from mature as a 46 year-old can get.

But I'm mature enough to love my wife.

 

Depends on the people. Personality development and spiritual growth are continual processes and they don't just end at a certain age. At least they shouldn't. I suppose if someone is in his late twenties, you can expect him not to change so much in the future, but it doesn't always work like this. Imagine a person who devotes all his life to studying and only stops being a studious student at age 28 or 29 with a doctorate. That person may well be mature and responsible, but there will still be a lot of job and house finding, meeting people, looking for potential romantic interests (partners are in a business enterprise, not a relationship, I'm telling you ).

 

This is something that really shouldn't be generalised.

 

Aikanaro is one of the most mature people I know.

And then there's people like Splunge.

Has nothing to do with age.

 

i believe maturity is simply understanding, your sexually mature when you understand the physical and mental implications of the act, if a girl gets pregnant by 'accident' and chooses abortion then she was not sexually mature enough to handle it.

same with other situations, if you drive and get nervous of flustered then you are not mature enough to drive.

 

I don't have anything to back up my assertion, but I have always believed if you can get a boy to age 25 without him killing himself you will probably end up with a man.

I have never heard a female utter the phrase "It seemed like a good idea at the time..."

 

Ok, everyone, I guess this was too broad a question. My apologies.

 

Organically, the brain stops development at about 23. That doesn't mean you're mature then. I'm only 22 and from 14 I've been more mature than many adults I know. Sexual maturity is as much a function of what society conciders mature as it is how quickly society teaches children this. In the middle ages, girls frequently had their first child before 16 years old, and they were concidered mature. In the moder society, a woman may not be concidered mature at the age of 25 depending on how she acts. This is as much dependant on what we require to call someone mature as it is on how quickly people are exposed to the harsher realities.

On high-school relationships, all relationships start out as a guess. You guess that you and person X may work out together in the short term, and be able to work it out for the long term. If you are wrong, the relationship 'fails' and maybe you learn a little more about what kind of person you're looking for. If it works, well, it works. I'm still dating my gf from the last days of high school and there's nothing standing between us and years of happy marriage that we can't overcome.

 

Maturity can only be judged on an individual basis. ANyway, can it really be judged at all, because maturity splits into a number of different areas.

For example: You can be mature enough to be able to watch gory movies and be unaffected by it, but you might not be mature enough to deal with breaking up a relationship.

Then again, the best way to deal with such things is (imho) through experiance.
As for thes econd point, the best time for that seems to be the never-ending battleground of puberty and teenage years.

 

Men never really get properly mature. There's always the inner child inside every bloke.

Women tend to want to mature before their time.

Venus. Mars.

 

If men never get mature then we need to revise our definition of maturity then.

 

Nuh-unnnnnnhhhh!