Favorite funny NPC Dialogs?

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I just talked to a Peasant in the slums who asked if that was a 'rat' I was carrying and offered two coppers for him...wasn't sure what he meant. I had JUST picked up Jan and I thought he meant him (he IS kinda rat-ish), Turns out he was referring to Boo hehe. Mincs said 'No! Boo is NOT for eating! Boo is mighty and wise and proboably quite stringy. Er, and he is my companion!'...Hiarious...Which NPC dialogs are your favorite?

 

i like the dialog between PC and Minsc inside the dungeon where he goes mad

 

There is so much funny dialogue, especially with Banter Pack installed it is hard to choose but I think mine was a comment Edwin made to Me.

I sitting here feeling omnipotent and godlike when I click on Edwin. He responds as follows:

"Edwin do this...Edwin do that. Someone give this jerk a banana."

 

Heh. Edwin thinks yer a monkey LOL...love it. He is such a condescending, arrogant jerk...reminds me of myself

 

I love that Edwin comment, but I also love the pirate dialog

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If you have Minsc in your party when you speak with the pirate lord, the conversation is hilarious when you have him try and convince the pirate lord that your party is insane.
"I feel stupider just having spoken to you... Stupider? More stupid? BAH! Send them Spellhold"

Of course I didn't get the convo all right but you get my drift

 

I also love the bit where Edwin tells Viconia that many courtesans have been left gasping beneath his erotic onslaught Wahaha!

 

yeah edwin is really funny especially when the nether scroll misfortune happens and transforms into edwina!try having anomen and minsc in the party.well thats the point you will laugh until you have no breath!trust me

 

One in Spellhold with Haer'Dalis and Jan. After talking to Dradeel, who says "you've the rank smell of Golodon the Unmanned!", Jan says he's heard that name but can't remember where.

Haer'Dalis chimes in with something like "I do not mean to alarm you, friends, but for once, Jan has failed to come up with something to say. Surely the apocalypse is upon us!" Jan yells at him, Korgan laughs, and so did I.

EDIT: Most of Minsc's stuff is good, especially his interaction with "Edwina". My personal favourites are his lament after speaking to Aerie about Dynaheir ("Oh Boo, we can never return home! I am no man and you are no hamster!" After Aerie offers to become his new witch, Minsc thunders, "You hear that, Evil? Minsc and Boo have a new witch! WOE IS YOU!"), and his commentary about you needing a hamster, or maybe an ice weasel, when your reputation hits Heroic. Even one of the selection comments cracks me up - *squeak* "Boo says, 'WHAAAAAAT?'"

 

Ya Mincs is the funniest...love that 'get you a hampster' bit.

 

When you talk to this guy in the top left hand corner of Waukeens Promenade he asks you where some place is and Minsc proceeds to tell him how Boo knows where it is and the guy just sort of plays along.

 

What made me laugh the most was a story Jan tells Anomen about Ano the dung orc. The story was great, as was Anomen's reaction.

 

Hmmm...well, out of all the funny choices, I have to agree that the moron Minsc takes the cake with:

"Many thanks, Aerie! Maybe, soon, Boo can return his little mind to thought of butt-kicking instead of butt-itching, and I for one shall be very relieved!"

Or perhaps Edwin and HaerDaelis’ conversation:

HaerDaelis’: I once knew a Red Wizard of Thay
who dreamed of lichdom someday.
He said he knew how to do it
But he still managed to screw it
up in the funniest way.
Edwin: (Thank the gods he is not a better poet. This is one tale we would rather not see in immortalized print!)

 

I think the conversation between Haer Dalis and Viconia is pretty funny--the one where he says his head is about to explode after she gets him all riled up.

 

Doy.. I just talked to Edwin. He gave me the key to Mae'Vars Box and told me it was one floor below. I refused to let him join my group so he called us 'simians' and left. I then proceeded to take the wrong exit proving he was right lol.

 

I love it when Jan tries to steal Boo from Minsc.

When Jaheira questions Minsc's abilities as a Ranger is a pretty good dialogue too.

 

Valygar's "Minsc, something about you concerns me..." conversation is a lot of fun.

Also Viconia asking Minsc about the tatoo. "....Boo loves Minsc's face too! Don't you, Boo? Don't you?" *squeak* "Yes."

 

Edwina: (I will kill ALL of them. Slowly. With ... with HOT pokey things and ... and coals and ... and prods. Yessss, prods. Many, many prods.)
Minsc: I think she warms to our company, Boo. See how she looks longingly?

 

Minsc is objectively the best character ever.

"Buttons are not how you escape dungeons! I would smash the button and rain beatings down upon the mage for his trickery!"

"You point, I punch."

"Perhaps people just need a swift kick in the punctuals."

 

well the Orc's in Windspear hill ar really funny:
I didn't whant to terrorize and kick old people its just job

 

Argh! I had that poem stuck in my head for days.

And now it is back!