The Phantom Menace - 9 Years Later

Remove all ads!

Well I though that all six Star Wars movies were cool. So there. If it's got the Force and lightsabres, I'm there. You guys are far too picky! I'd hate to have been on the Jedi Council with you nitpickers.

Harbourjedi: "There's a galaxy wide conspiracy and the Gungans are involved!"
Mace Rabbit: "No way, mofo. Gungans are too lame and that wouldn't be a strong plot."
dmc-oda: "Anakin isn't switching convincingly to the dark side so it can't be true. Meditate some more I shall."

The only thing missing from the Star Wars movies was more Mr Miyagi action. If Pat Morita had been in charge of the Jedi Council then he'd have shown Mace Windu a thing or two about purple lightsabres.

 

Oh yeah! And let Miyagi teach Jar-Jar Binks the crane technique! Throw in Clint Eastwood as the Emperor ("Go ahead - make my Death Star"), and you'd have perfection!

 

I just read today that there are supposed to be fan edits of Ep. I and II out there, called 'The Phantom Edit' and 'Attack of the Phantom' respectivly. I couldn't find them, though.

 

@Fab

here http://www.mininova.org/tor/709643

and here : http://www.mininova.org/tor/711354

only bothered to search about 5 seconds, so i didn't fin a ny streams or stuff like that for ya, though they might be out there

the google search : http://www.google.dk/search?q=the+phantom+edit&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&aq=t&rls

 

IIRC, other people directed "Empire Strikes Back" and "Return of the Jedi", leaving Lucas to come up with good story ideas and state-of-the-art special effects. IMHO, their accomplishments with those movies stand the test of time despite some occasion cheesiness and some really bad ideas (I HATE the Ewoks!)

There was little redeeming in the prequels, however. I think Jake Lloyd is a better actor but when a kid that age gets sucky dialogue and sucky direction, you really can't blame the little fellow. I can blame the totally and completely unconvincing execution of what I agree with DR COULD have been an engaging story. The Jar Jar crap just ticked me off no end. The only part of the film that I found entertaining was the final fight with Darth Maul.

The next two films suffered from the same horrid flaws that have already been mentioned -- much more children's movies without the same depth or heart as the origiinal trilogy. Some cool fight sequences but not enough to make me buy any of it. The only fight scene that I really enjoyed was the final one when Obi-Wan fought Anakin and proved too gutless to finish the job.

To this day I will not watch anything with Haydyn Dorkenson. He may have suffered from bad scripting and directing, but I think he brought his own brand of suckiness to the films, and I refuse to finance the little moron's career.

 

I think episode 1 and 2 suck just as much now as they did when they came out. I only saw half of the second one before returning the DVD, and I didn't waste my time on the third one.

Just the sight of JarJar makes me want to murder something...

 

My god, don't even get me started on the new Star Wars movies. I absolutely love the original ones (I have literally seen episodes IV, V, and VI over 100 times each) and most everything about the old galaxy (i.e the Decipher TCG based on the original three movies).


These new ones though... besides looking like crap (the old ones look a lot more realistic because he made them with models, which are REAL... the CGI looks so freakin' fake in all of the new ones, it disgusts me. If he had made the new ones with models the movies would look a lot better), the acting is awful (far worse than anything Hamill said; he was always believable and multidimensional... Hayden Christensen is only an angsty teen... he took his character from Life as a House (which was actually decent) and put it into the Star Wars world), the inconsistencies are so lame (like how in the new movies their weapons and vehicles are far superior technologically, despite being chronologically before the original movies), and the characters are horrendous (Jar Jar was mentioned before; Anakin's slave master in I was a stupid character; in fact, all the Gungans are ridiculously stupid).

I am so pissed right now just thinking about the traveshamockery that Lucas created that I am forcefully removing myself from SP...

 

Thanks.