1. SPS Accounts:
    Do you find yourself coming back time after time? Do you appreciate the ongoing hard work to keep this community focused and successful in its mission? Please consider supporting us by upgrading to an SPS Account. Besides the warm and fuzzy feeling that comes from supporting a good cause, you'll also get a significant number of ever-expanding perks and benefits on the site and the forums. Click here to find out more.
    Dismiss Notice
Dismiss Notice
You are currently viewing Boards o' Magick as a guest, but you can register an account here. Registration is fast, easy and free. Once registered you will have access to search the forums, create and respond to threads, PM other members, upload screenshots and access many other features unavailable to guests.

BoM cultivates a friendly and welcoming atmosphere. We have been aiming for quality over quantity with our forums from their inception, and believe that this distinction is truly tangible and valued by our members. We'd love to have you join us today!

(If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact us. If you've forgotten your username or password, click here.)

Hacked Game to Propose to Girlfriend

Discussion in 'Whatnots' started by Montresor, Apr 16, 2008.

  1. LKD Gems: 31/31
    Latest gem: Rogue Stone


    Veteran

    Joined:
    Aug 13, 2002
    Messages:
    6,284
    Likes Received:
    271
    Gender:
    Male
    In some cultures and sub-cultures it is considered appropriate to pop the question early to show enthusiasm and energy, not to mention courage. I am of the mindset that you should really, REALLY know the person and have talked about the possibility of marriage before actually popping the question officially. Even then it can blow up in your face, but the odds come way down if you really know and love the person and are sure they love you too.

    I don't agree with the whole "grand gesture" school of proposals. It makes for good movies and books but can have some pretty brutal consequences in the real world.
     
  2. Jack Funk Gems: 24/31
    Latest gem: Water Opal


    Joined:
    Apr 24, 2001
    Messages:
    1,778
    Likes Received:
    25
    Sad really. Lacks the social skills to do it in person, so has a computer ask for him. :(

    It's kind of like the guy who proposes by having the question appear on the stadium scoreboard.

    Weak.
     
  3. chevalier

    chevalier Knight of Everfull Chalice ★ SPS Account Holder Veteran

    Joined:
    Dec 14, 2002
    Messages:
    16,815
    Media:
    11
    Likes Received:
    58
    Gender:
    Male

    I believe in the school of common sense. Big gesture is usually not warranted. Sometimes, however, it is warranted. It is then that it should be done. Sometimes it is a good thing to attempt to make a memorable moment.

    Women like the show of energy and courage, as you undoubtedly have noticed. This is partly good and partly bad. Personally, I don't like certain aspects of it. Ever felt bad about fighting for the enjoyment of those who don't fight? Lawyers also know that feeling, although from a different angle. It shows with women.
     
  4. Aldeth the Foppish Idiot

    Aldeth the Foppish Idiot Armed with My Mallet O' Thinking Veteran

    Joined:
    May 15, 2003
    Messages:
    12,434
    Media:
    46
    Likes Received:
    250
    Gender:
    Male
    I agree, but the moment does not have to involve a grandiose gesture for it to be memorable. I proposed to my wife while we were at a tree farm, looking for a Christmas tree. ("Hey, I found the perfect tree over here!") It was a rather mundane activity, but I don't think either of us will forget the moment.
     
  5. Enagonios Gems: 31/31
    Latest gem: Rogue Stone


    Joined:
    Apr 8, 2001
    Messages:
    6,089
    Likes Received:
    5
    I'm going with both here. I believe that you should definitely have been talking about it and have both considered it for a while but I still think that when the gesture comes it should at least be memorable. Not "grand" per se but thought out at least.

    Or you could go with Chris O'Donnel's killer proposal from "The Bachelor".

    "This is it. Sh*t or get off the pot" :shake:
     
  6. chevalier

    chevalier Knight of Everfull Chalice ★ SPS Account Holder Veteran

    Joined:
    Dec 14, 2002
    Messages:
    16,815
    Media:
    11
    Likes Received:
    58
    Gender:
    Male
    Personally, I'm not so sure if you should have been talking for a longer while before proposing. On the one hand, it does seem reasonable. Choices need to be made reasonably. On the other hand, sometimes proposals come relatively out of the blue (as far as the timing goes rather than the person proposing) and sometimes they come out of what would otherwise be considered a friendship. In those situations it may well be better than talking for a long period of time about the arrangements to be made.

    For instance, imagine two people nearing their thirties. They've been friends for a longer while and there have been no romantic excesses. They just know they can depend on each other and there's been a little crush that hasn't found expression. Discussing the issue doesn't really make much point - it may be preferable for the man to make the proposal and for the woman to consider it when it comes. Sometimes actions speak louder than words.

    If I were hypothetically to propose to a good friend, I would do just that, on condition that I were convinced (as opposed to "maybe we should"). Note that this is true mostly of people who don't do the whole boyfriend-girlfriend thing, don't date etc. That is actually a reasonable way in so far as a short period of going out isn't able to make you know you're making the right choice. At the same time romance is not necessary to get to know the person, or even fall in love for that matter, while keeping it friends doesn't close you to other options too early or impose pressure strong enough to make you make choice you otherwise wouldn't make. A good example would be a co-worker, a person fighting for the same cause, someone you meet daily etc.
     
Sorcerer's Place is a project run entirely by fans and for fans. Maintaining Sorcerer's Place and a stable environment for all our hosted sites requires a substantial amount of our time and funds on a regular basis, so please consider supporting us to keep the site up & running smoothly. Thank you!

Sorcerers.net is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to products on amazon.com, amazon.ca and amazon.co.uk. Amazon and the Amazon logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates.