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Is This Man Cheating on His Wife?

Discussion in 'Alley of Dangerous Angles' started by Taluntain, Aug 16, 2007.

  1. Montresor

    Montresor Mostly Harmless Staff Member ★ SPS Account Holder

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    In my three years at Sorceror's, I have seen the Idiot plaque bestowed on only one or two posters. It is not used lightly. In fact, it is only used on posters who have already discredited themselves.

    Tal is not a "supermod", he is the founder and owner of Sorceror's Place. Without him there wouldn't be any forums here. As such he does get to make the rules - including how to punish repeated rule-breakers. Every one of us is free to leave if we don't like the rules.

    It's like visiting a private home - you do so under a tacit understanding that you're expected to maintain a decent tone towards the hosts and other guests rather than picking fights or yelling insults, and that the hosts have a right to evict you from their premises if you don't behave according to house rules. Depending on the hosts' patience they may ask you one or more times - in private or publicly - to moderate your behavior, before outright asking you to leave, and they may within reasonable bounds decide the way in which they warn or evict you.
     
  2. Rallymama Gems: 31/31
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    @TMH: The IOTW plaque doesn't discredit a poster, it's simply recognition for the job of discrediting that you've already done on your own.

    BTW, 137 posts in 22 months as a registered member of the BoM does NOT qualify you as a "diligent poster." Repeatedly trying to ram your opinions down others' throats while refusing to extend them the courtesy of considering what they have to say also isn't diligence, it's mere stubbornness. You would do well to realize that conversation is not a competitive sport.

    [ August 27, 2007, 14:52: Message edited by: Rallymama ]
     
  3. dmc

    dmc Speak softly and carry a big briefcase Staff Member Distinguished Member ★ SPS Account Holder Resourceful Adored Veteran New Server Contributor [2012] (for helping Sorcerer's Place lease a new, more powerful server!)

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    That's enough. Please do not respond to TMH in this particular arena, as it is certainly not on point and adds nothing to the discourse.

    He has made his own bed.
     
  4. chevalier

    chevalier Knight of Everfull Chalice ★ SPS Account Holder Veteran

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    @Drew (indirectly, also Gnarff):

    Actually, wouldn't be so sure. Adultery would have to be something sexual, while broader infidelity perhaps not really. Well, you could extend "coveting" to include non-sexual coveting as well, as in lust for goods, but I don't think it would make adultery.
     
  5. Taluntain

    Taluntain Resident Alpha and Omega Staff Member ★ SPS Account Holder Resourceful Adored Veteran Pillars of Eternity SP Immortalizer (for helping immortalize Sorcerer's Place in the game!) New Server Contributor [2012] (for helping Sorcerer's Place lease a new, more powerful server!) Torment: Tides of Numenera SP Immortalizer (for helping immortalize Sorcerer's Place in the game!) BoM XenForo Migration Contributor [2015] (for helping support the migration to new forum software!)

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    [​IMG] Everyone who's posted here regarding the current IotW; please read this thread. We have rules in place to prevent this kind of topic derailment.

    Hopefully we can still manage to salvage this one.
     
  6. kmonster Gems: 24/31
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    I'd be careful with phrases like "for the christians" and "from a christian perspective".
    There are so many christian communities which believe differently (some might even allow freedom of thougtht or other strange things :D )

    PS: By using such phrases you are also implying that someone who thinks differently is no christian.
     
  7. chevalier

    chevalier Knight of Everfull Chalice ★ SPS Account Holder Veteran

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    Not really. Unless you're only Christian if you have a perfectly Christian opinion on everything. Then you could say you are only Christian if you only ever exhibit Christian behaviours. And so on. That way few people would be Christians.
     
  8. Rallymama Gems: 31/31
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    I think the situation described above would also be considered a violation of Jewish marriage vows. ;)
     
  9. chevalier

    chevalier Knight of Everfull Chalice ★ SPS Account Holder Veteran

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    I think any vows where you say you won't leave the spouse and will forsake all others. ;)
     
  10. The Mountain Hare Banned

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    Mont:
    What rules have I broken?

    Frankly, I'm proud to receive the 'Idiot of the Week' award. I'm essentially a matyr for truth now. In fact, I'm going to be even more blunt and direct, to live up to my reputation of 'warrior for truth' (or as the smear campaigners label me: Idiot).

    How's that for backfire! :)

    [As far as famous last words go, pretty bland. But hey... -Tal]

    [ August 28, 2007, 12:41: Message edited by: Taluntain ]
     
  11. Splunge

    Splunge Bhaal’s financial advisor Adored Veteran Pillars of Eternity SP Immortalizer (for helping immortalize Sorcerer's Place in the game!) Torment: Tides of Numenera SP Immortalizer (for helping immortalize Sorcerer's Place in the game!)

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    OK, I've had a bit of time to check in here, and so I'll say this:

    Am I the only one who finds TMH's posts (and the associated responses) entertaining? TMH is clearly here only to create trouble. And the good people of SP have fallen for it hook, line, and s(t)inker. Well, maybe just "hook". After all, someone (it might have been DR) previously suggested that TMH was a "fake poster". As if that wasn't totally obvious.

    Let's be honest - it's been fun, in a frustrating sort of way. And who might this fake poster be? Well, The Mountain Hare. Death Rabbit. I'm just sayin'. (Actualy, I suspect Shralp, to be honest.)

    :p

    Edit: with apologies to dmc and his edit above. I suspect this post will be deleted anyway.
     
  12. The Mountain Hare Banned

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    How about this, people.

    If you don't like what I have to say, and you genuinely think I am trolling, then put me on your 'Ignore List'. If I am indeed a troll, the worst punishment for me is simply to ignore my statements. Giving someone an 'Idiot Plaque' merely provokes them further, troll or non-troll.

    What's funny is that a particular poster PM'ed me to state that he'd reported me, and placed me on his ignore list. I find it fascinating that the same people who scream about my 'trolling' (?) are willing to further provoke my wrath.

    And surely, if I'm on your ignore list, why do you need to run to the mods like a whiny little bitch? What exactly does that achieve? So that they can get the last word? Get a little bit of vengeance on a poster who handed their ass to them? Good job, whiny little troll. Go cry in a corner.
     
  13. Beren

    Beren Lovesick and Lonely Wanderer Staff Member ★ SPS Account Holder Resourceful Adored Veteran Pillars of Eternity SP Immortalizer (for helping immortalize Sorcerer's Place in the game!) New Server Contributor [2012] (for helping Sorcerer's Place lease a new, more powerful server!) Torment: Tides of Numenera SP Immortalizer (for helping immortalize Sorcerer's Place in the game!)

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    [​IMG] @ The Mountain Hare

    Are you begging to get banned in some kind of blaze of glory? Knock the bs off already.

    @ Everybody else

    We have made ourselves clear on how the rest of you are not to behave when it comes to Idiots of the Week. Tal posted this thread in the Sorcerous Sundries and the link to it in this thread. dmc has also made the point clear. To express ourselves on this point and then be ignored repeatedly by multiple posters is almost as aggravating as the behaviour that lead to somebody earning the plaque. I trust that this will be the very last time that any of us have to address this.

    [ August 28, 2007, 11:33: Message edited by: Beren ]
     
  14. Drew

    Drew Arrogant, contemptible, and obnoxious Adored Veteran

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    Hmm.....well, when I view the passage in Matthew and other, similar passages, which claim that by thinking about committing adultery, you have already committed adultery in your own heart, I get a somewhat different impression, but I suppose it isn't necessarily all that cut and dry....and I certainly didn't mean to imply that someone who disagrees with such an assertion isn't a "real" Christian (especially given my status as a militant agnostic).
     
  15. Enagonios Gems: 31/31
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    imo, it's cheating. He's got an "actual" wife, so he should be sharing his emotions with her. kinda sad actually, heh.
     
  16. Montresor

    Montresor Mostly Harmless Staff Member ★ SPS Account Holder

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    I am not sure that there exists an objective definition of "cheating". Linguistics has no "factlist" regarding the exact meaning of specific words, as seen by the fact that different dictionaries have different definitions. Each of us will have to ask ourselves what we would do or think in a similar situation.

    If my girlfriend or wife turned her back on me in order to log on to Second Life and "play House" online for hours, while completely neglecting me, I would feel deeply hurt. If I complained about this and she continued to prefer the company of her online husband to mine, I would probably regard our relationship as over, at least emotionally. Thus, he is "cheating" by my definition.
     
  17. chevalier

    chevalier Knight of Everfull Chalice ★ SPS Account Holder Veteran

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    @Drew:

    Thinking about committing adultery - as in a choice to engage in fantasies, not as in a momentary biological reaction over which you don't have control - counts. But if you go around pretending you're married in some game, it's possible it doesn't happen. Maybe in that game where they have strippers and all sorts of visually represented debauchery, yeah. But consider the Sims... would it necessarily invoke sexual lust if two people played each one character in the Hot Date expansion? ;) Not like I'd think it proper for married people anyway. I'm just reluctant to jump to conclusions over the gaps. ;)
     
  18. Drew

    Drew Arrogant, contemptible, and obnoxious Adored Veteran

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    Ah....here's where we differ. See, I don't buy for a second that this guy isn't fantasizing about this lady. I don't think he's being honest about it being "just a game" to him. I also don't buy that there's never been any cyber-hanky-panky. Frankly, if I thought he were telling the truth and there really is no real emotional involvement with this woman, I probably would be more hesitant to say he's cheating.....I'd probably be arguing that, while what he's doing is really harmful to his marriage, what he really needs is an intervention and lots of therapy...and probably prozac.
     
  19. chevalier

    chevalier Knight of Everfull Chalice ★ SPS Account Holder Veteran

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    I'd think it's not really anything about the other woman as a real life person. I understand where such conclusions come from, but they aren't guaranteed and they don't feel intuitively right to me. I'd say it's more like a vicarious life which he lives at impunity through his make-believe character. Remember the part where they said the actions were pretended but the reactions were basically the same at the neuron level?

    Then again, if there's any sexual gratification in such a vicarious life, it generally falls under Matthew 5:28. ;) And if it's coveting someone as a spouse the way you would covet an efficient slave in the olden time or a worker or son or daughter or warrior or well... whatever it is that isn't sexual but makes the person desirable - in casu as a spouse, then I'm a bit at a loss, to be honest. Can't really arrive at a sharp conclusion.
     
  20. Wordplay Gems: 29/31
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    I don't think it's too complicated. Imaginary really means "unreal, non-true", so it's all inside his head. I.e: it's not cheating, since anyone can have fancies about anyone and that's okay.

    I just wouldn't advertise it or would have to cut it short if it offended the real deal. Virtual is nice and all, but screw it when the real thing is available. :D
     
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