1. SPS Accounts:
    Do you find yourself coming back time after time? Do you appreciate the ongoing hard work to keep this community focused and successful in its mission? Please consider supporting us by upgrading to an SPS Account. Besides the warm and fuzzy feeling that comes from supporting a good cause, you'll also get a significant number of ever-expanding perks and benefits on the site and the forums. Click here to find out more.
    Dismiss Notice
Dismiss Notice
You are currently viewing Boards o' Magick as a guest, but you can register an account here. Registration is fast, easy and free. Once registered you will have access to search the forums, create and respond to threads, PM other members, upload screenshots and access many other features unavailable to guests.

BoM cultivates a friendly and welcoming atmosphere. We have been aiming for quality over quantity with our forums from their inception, and believe that this distinction is truly tangible and valued by our members. We'd love to have you join us today!

(If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact us. If you've forgotten your username or password, click here.)

Am I ugly, or just paranoid?

Discussion in 'Whatnots' started by Iku-Turso, Jan 23, 2006.

  1. Iku-Turso Gems: 26/31
    Latest gem: Diamond


    Joined:
    Oct 15, 2005
    Messages:
    2,393
    Media:
    1
    Likes Received:
    28
    [​IMG] Ok.

    So far, no mirrors broken.

    People don't feel nauseated for looking at my face.

    Kids don't point their fingers and laugh at me, when I pass them by.

    But what if I'm just ugly enough that it doesn't actually show, but it will affect people's judgment on me in a way that they can't quite trust me, or that what ever I say or do, they find it amusing.

    Of course they couldn't quite point this out, since they probably don't even know that my original looks make them feel the way they do. And of course this whole topic is so stupid that if I ever ask this from someone I know, they can't say anything about it or they'll just burst out laughing.

    So how can I tell? Without posting my picture anywhere or making a donkey out of myself anywhere else than in SP, that is.

    And has anyone else had these kinds of problems?
     
  2. JiggaJay Gems: 10/31
    Latest gem: Zircon


    Joined:
    Oct 17, 2005
    Messages:
    395
    Likes Received:
    0
    Pics. Now. :p I posted a pic of myself posing as Aarin Gend and made a donkey out of myself, but it was all in good fun.

    No, I have not had this kind of problem. Also, you could check your charisma stat on your character sheet :p
     
  3. Iku-Turso Gems: 26/31
    Latest gem: Diamond


    Joined:
    Oct 15, 2005
    Messages:
    2,393
    Media:
    1
    Likes Received:
    28
    Yeah, that might be it, but I was actually hoping that some sagely people of the SP in their infinite wisdom would just point me out that I'm hideously deformed.

    Augh! I'm a bard with a Char stat of 10! The cruelty! Not bad looking, but not good looking enough to hide my oafish manners!

    Edit: And no pictures; technical difficulties, you see.
     
  4. Nakia

    Nakia The night is mine Distinguished Member ★ SPS Account Holder Adored Veteran Pillars of Eternity SP Immortalizer (for helping immortalize Sorcerer's Place in the game!) Torment: Tides of Numenera SP Immortalizer (for helping immortalize Sorcerer's Place in the game!) BoM XenForo Migration Contributor [2015] (for helping support the migration to new forum software!)

    Joined:
    Jun 26, 2003
    Messages:
    5,575
    Media:
    102
    Likes Received:
    136
    Gender:
    Female
    Iku-Turso, without seeing a good picture of you I can't really judge. Based on what you have posted my guess is that you are of average looks, neither stunningly handsome or revoltingly ugly.

    Does that help any?
     
  5. Leppi Gems: 3/31
    Latest gem: Lynx Eye


    Joined:
    Jul 28, 2004
    Messages:
    62
    Likes Received:
    0
    I agree with Nakia. If you were ugly, you would know. You are probably just paranoid :p
     
  6. Bahir the Red Gems: 18/31
    Latest gem: Horn Coral


    Joined:
    Jul 13, 2004
    Messages:
    1,072
    Likes Received:
    1
    Post your pic and we will know. Since nobody knows you here, it wouldnt matter. Even if someone knew you (although then they would probably already know how you looked like) or lived near you, it still wouldnt matter. The fact that they frequent these boards (how else would they see the picture) must tell you something (that they, to some extent, can be mocked for being nerds, which in turn takes away their right to tease other people)
     
  7. Barmy Army

    Barmy Army Simple mind, simple pleasures... Adored Veteran

    Joined:
    May 26, 2003
    Messages:
    6,586
    Media:
    2
    Likes Received:
    162
    I don't know about ugly, but you seem extremely insecure - which is worse.
     
  8. chevalier

    chevalier Knight of Everfull Chalice ★ SPS Account Holder Veteran

    Joined:
    Dec 14, 2002
    Messages:
    16,815
    Media:
    11
    Likes Received:
    58
    Gender:
    Male
    I can't judge your looks without seeing your picture. I will spare you the looks aren't everything crap (although it's actually true in a large part), I won't tell you that "oh, no, you certainly must be handsome" or assume that you're ugly just because you think you are. :p

    You can't be that awful if kids don't make fun of you, though. If you were really ugly, they would make fun of you, not only kids, and you would certainly have caught at least a couple of people talking behind your back or even reacting to your appearance with a grimace. So it can't be *that* bad. And if it isn't *that* bad, crap, you can leave with it. Even if it happens to be below average on the beauty scale. Besides, people have different ideas of beauty, so what some like others hate. There are women who think I'm hideous and there are women who think I'm gorgeous and heck, even I can't decide sometimes. There are various ways to make up for lack of exceptional looks and not all are surgical. ;) Plus, perhaps it's exaggerated, anyway. Sometimes people think they're ugly while the rest of the world thinks they're pretty.

    In the looks area, you can achieve a lot by just paying attention to your hygiene, how you dress, shaving or trimming your facial hair neatly, combing your hair and keeping it in shape, keeping yourself in shape, in general. Working out if you like the idea. Or choosing the right hair and clothing style if you're a girl (Okay, I do know you're a guy. :p ). Come on, no one is really ugly if he's well groomed and carefully dressed.

    Plus, kindness and politeness is more important than just looking good. :p I even think it has a bigger effect on people's reaction, at least if you're male. ;)

    [ January 23, 2006, 22:21: Message edited by: chevalier ]
     
  9. Harbourboy

    Harbourboy Take thy form from off my door! Veteran Pillars of Eternity SP Immortalizer (for helping immortalize Sorcerer's Place in the game!)

    Joined:
    May 29, 2003
    Messages:
    13,346
    Likes Received:
    97
    Beauty is most definitely in the eye of the beholder. (That's the person who is looking at you, not some ultra-scary thing with eyes on tentacles that shoot beams at you.)

    I bet you're not ugly, but only because hardly any one is really. Think about all your friend's parents. I bet they're not all super-models but they have still managed to get married and have families and be reasonably successful in life. That's the evidence you need to stop worrying about what you look like and start following chevalier's advice instead (did I really just say that?)
     
  10. Pac man Gems: 25/31
    Latest gem: Moonbar


    Joined:
    Nov 16, 2002
    Messages:
    2,119
    Likes Received:
    1
    Yep, you're ugly.

    :shake:
     
  11. Kitrax

    Kitrax Pantaloons are supposed to go where!?!?

    Joined:
    Apr 19, 2002
    Messages:
    7,899
    Media:
    74
    Likes Received:
    96
    Gender:
    Male
    I agree with Pac man. :p

    Without seeing a picture of you to prove that you actually *are* ugly, I'm just going to have to go with my gut feeling that you are in fact, ugly. :shake:

    Prove me wrong...

    Dude, you're not living in the 1920's...kids now-in-days take a descrete photo of you on their cell phone and then go home and write a blog about your uglyness on the net. :rolling:
     
  12. Dice

    Dice ★ SPS Account Holder Adored Veteran

    Joined:
    Jun 23, 2002
    Messages:
    5,124
    Media:
    24
    Likes Received:
    149
    Gender:
    Female
    Are you posting this topic because you are interested in a particular person in more than a "just friends" sort of way and are worried that they don't find you attractive?

    Chemistry is the key. If there is no chemistry then you could be Antonio Banderas and still not get affection from the one you desire. (Yah I know he's with Melanie Griffith but that is beside the point.) Likewise I've met many people who may not look nice in a picture but when met in person have charisma out the yinyang that more than makes up for a crooked nose of an uneven eyebrow.

    Love yourself and the rest will follow.
     
  13. Daie d'Malkin

    Daie d'Malkin Shoulda gone to Specsavers

    Joined:
    Jun 10, 2002
    Messages:
    2,636
    Likes Received:
    1
    Don't worry about it, I wondered this once, and after a minute or two near the mirror I decided that I am gorgeous. I recommend you do the same thing.
     
  14. Iku-Turso Gems: 26/31
    Latest gem: Diamond


    Joined:
    Oct 15, 2005
    Messages:
    2,393
    Media:
    1
    Likes Received:
    28
    Oh yeah, insecure, that's me. At least right now, but that's what losing a long-time relationship might do to some people, like me for instance.

    I sort of posted this topic so that I'd get few reminders of the things that are important. And for a few laughs as well. Thanks for providing them.

    I'm more undecided of my looks than anything and having only lousy pictures of myself doesn't really help.

    And I'm not posting those pictures, since they're not that becoming, and I actually don't need an opinion on my looks, at least not right now.

    And yes, I am interested in someone, and she wants to see how I look (yes it's an internet thing), and I'm insecure about it. But maybe I'll just stop worrying; if looks are that important to her, well then she's not probably my kind of a person anyways..
     
  15. Sir Farivald

    Sir Farivald The Obsidian Cleric

    Joined:
    Oct 27, 2005
    Messages:
    115
    Likes Received:
    0
    Well, fear not my friend. Back in Summer 2004 I suddenly became single after a long relationship, and it hit me pretty hard. Needless to say though, looking back, the summer following this break up was one of the best times of my life. You learn who your friends are in that situation, you realise that you don't need to depend on any one person to live, survive or be happy. You remember just how great life is regardless of whether or not you have someone to call your girlfriend/boyfriend.
    The insecurity might be an issue, but even if you don't feel confident about your looks, others don't need to know that. Feigned confidence can work just as well as real confidence, and 90% of the time it becomes the real thing anyway. Time heals all, as they say, and until I figure out just how to cast this "Cure Light Wounds" spell, time is what we must rely on. It'll work for you too!
     
  16. Iku-Turso Gems: 26/31
    Latest gem: Diamond


    Joined:
    Oct 15, 2005
    Messages:
    2,393
    Media:
    1
    Likes Received:
    28
    Well thank you Sir Farivald, you are most kind and wise. Time has already started to heal my wounds and things are looking better already.

    Maybe someday I'll terrify you all with a picture of me, just for the fiendishness of it. :evil:
     
  17. Enagonios Gems: 31/31
    Latest gem: Rogue Stone


    Joined:
    Apr 8, 2001
    Messages:
    6,089
    Likes Received:
    5
    Damn, HB beat me to it! i'll rephrase: Beauty is in the eye of the Beerholder then ;)
     
  18. Sarevok• Gems: 23/31
    Latest gem: Black Opal


    Joined:
    Nov 7, 2003
    Messages:
    1,666
    Likes Received:
    0
    Looks are important to everyone, varying degrees, sure, but they are important. If you're hideously ugly and/or obese, then yeah, no pretty girl in the world is going to want to shag you, end of story, but that's your problem, not theirs. Insecurity is off putting, so don't be insecure. Good confidence and a fun personality will combat poor looks, but there's obviously a line.
     
  19. Blog Gems: 23/31
    Latest gem: Black Opal


    Joined:
    Sep 4, 2002
    Messages:
    1,634
    Likes Received:
    1
    I feel your pain. Sometimes when I sit in the bus, all the other seats are taken before the one next to me. I know I look nerdy and my skin is far from perfect, so sometimes I think that's the reason. That's partly why I like to get on the bus later where I'm "forced" to sit next to someone instead.

    But really, just focus on the good things that happen. Like when a girl looks at you and smiles. Or makes eye contact. Or waves. Sure, it might be because they are too far away to see your ugliness in detail, but their paying you attention still feels good!
     
  20. Iku-Turso Gems: 26/31
    Latest gem: Diamond


    Joined:
    Oct 15, 2005
    Messages:
    2,393
    Media:
    1
    Likes Received:
    28
    Allright...here's an image of me...the point is that it's modified, first accidentally, but since it looked cooler this way, I let it be.

    And I have an issue with putting my face in the net as it is, so this might be just as good as it gets.

    [​IMG]

    Edit: Special thanks to Jiggajay, for giving me this silly idea in the first place, and for providing imageshack address in his 'do I look like my avatar?' thread.
     
Sorcerer's Place is a project run entirely by fans and for fans. Maintaining Sorcerer's Place and a stable environment for all our hosted sites requires a substantial amount of our time and funds on a regular basis, so please consider supporting us to keep the site up & running smoothly. Thank you!

Sorcerers.net is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to products on amazon.com, amazon.ca and amazon.co.uk. Amazon and the Amazon logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates.